Forgive Yourself: It’s Imperative

by: Donna Long

May 21, 2025

...and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us.
— Matthew 6:12

Today I want to share with you some thoughts about forgiveness, the absolute necessity to forgive, and especially the absolute necessity of forgiving ourselves.

The disciples asked Jesus to teach them to pray like He prayed. Most of us have recited the “Lord’s Prayer” many times and therefore are familiar with the Matthew 6:9-13 version where Jesus tells His disciples (which is a directive to us as well), to

Pray like this: Our Father in heaven, may Your name be kept holy. May Your Kingdom come soon. May Your will be done on earth, as it is in heaven. Give us today the food we need, and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us. And don’t let us yield to temptation, but rescue us from the evil one. For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.

Jesus was so emphatic about forgiving us our sins as we have forgiven others, that He repeated it in verses 14 and 15 with even more emphasis.

If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.

For the first time in my years of reading and studying the Bible, I’ve never consciously connected forgiving others and yourself with what Jesus said in Matthew 22 when Jesus was responding to an entrapment question from the Pharisees. I invite you to read it again for the very first time and see if you can connect the dots with me.

Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. Second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:37-39).

Love your neighbor as yourself. Everyone who has given a thought to loving yourself today, raise your hand...*crickets.* Me neither. So I dare say, we probably haven’t given a thought to forgiving ourselves today either. But we need to.

It is undoubtedly as important to the Lord that we forgive ourselves as it is that we forgive others, because if we are not forgiving ourselves, then there’s no way we can love ourselves. And the Lord said very clearly in verse 39 of Matthew 22 that we are to love our neighbors as we love ourselves.

Let’s look at a detailed definition of the word “forgive.” Don’t roll your eyes, I know we’ve all been taught what the word forgive means, but have we ever gone to the depths of how “forgiving” ourselves can affect us personally? It’s a very powerful, busy verb for such a short word.

Forgive

  1. To give up resentment against or stop wanting to punish (ourselves) for an offense or fault; pardon.

  2. To relent in being angry or in wishing to exact punishment for (an offense or fault) (on ourselves).

  3. To absolve (ourselves) from payment of….

  4. To grant forgiveness (to ourselves).

  5. To pardon, to waive any negative feeling or desire for punishment (against ourselves).

  6. To accord forgiveness (to ourselves).

Once we’ve forgiven ourselves and begin to agree with how Jesus views our sins in Isaiah 43:25, we will find our ability to love the Lord with our “all” will also increase our ability to love and forgive others, as we are now loving and forgiving ourselves.

I, yes I, am the One and Only, who completely erases your sins, never to be seen again. I will not remember them again. Freely I do this because of who I am!TPT, Isaiah 43:25.


Worship: First Love


Prayer

Lord Jesus, by a decision of my will I choose to forgive myself for all of my sins that I have confessed and asked forgiveness from You today. I choose to release myself from my unforgiveness and I make peace with myself. Having done this, I ask You, Abba Father, to please help me to choose to love myself as You so extravagantly love me. Please help me, Holy Spirit, to obey Your Word in not only choosing to love myself and forgive myself, but others as well. I can only do it with Your help. In Jesus’ precious name I pray. Amen.


Further Study

Genesis 1:27; Psalm 139:14; I Thessalonians 3:12; 1 John 3:1


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